Earlier today I was at a BBQ. At one point I was talking with a few women about babies and, my all time favorite topic, biological clocks. One of the women had twin 6-month-old boys and was discussing how she wanted to have another child soon, but her husband wanted to wait several years. She was 31 and felt her clock was ticking so she wanted to get going sooner rather than later. I shared my concerns about my own ticking time bomb. One of the other women (also 31), who apparently pegged me for being in my mid 20's, then said to me: "Don't worry. I have some friends who are like THIRTY and don't even have a BOYFRIEND, so you're fine." As I simultaneously breathed fire and gave her the cold stare of death, I replied: "Yeah. I'm 30. And I don't have a boyfriend." She giggled and, somehow thinking this would make it better, let me know that when she and her husband went to the doctor to discuss family planning the doctor told her that a woman didn't need to worry about fertility problems and other issues until she was 35. So I have 5 more good years.
Please. Oh please. Just stop talking before I punch you in your fallopian tube.
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