Break Up Blog

So I guess I need to report that Guy Friend and I broke up. Although this is sad news for Guy Friend and I, it is clearly amazing news for the blog as it means you'll all have something to read again (because I know you've all stopped reading completely since I stopped blogging). Guy Friend and I seem to have had a pretty fairytale breakup (caring, mutual, non-hostile, healthy) and are on excellent terms. In many, many ways this was the best relationship I've ever had and also the best breakup.

I'm not ready to start dating again, but have already been asked out by several guys who either heard that we broke up or just cosmically have good ego-stroking timing. Below is the list of excuses I've used in my head for why I don't want to go out with these guys:

1. He's too young
2. He lives too far away
3. He doesn't get my sense of humor
4. He drinks too much
5. He hunts turkeys
6. He's a faster runner than I am
7. He's a Republican
8. He hunts deer
9. He's a slower runner than I am
10. I don't want to cross the Bay Bridge

Some excuses may be more legit than others. Leave me alone, I'll get back in the game when I'm ready!